Monday, February 9, 2009

To tell or not to tell...

Been pondering whether to tell a good friend of mine about my recent immersion into erotica. I saw something today on another blog - a name - and I went holy shit! and I've decided NOT to tell her. It was one of those creepy omen type things. Wish I could say more, haha, because you'd all get a kick out of it, but I can't. 

So, that's been decided for me. Funny how life works.

7 comments:

Craig Sorensen said...

I've told my closest friends about my erotica, and they've read some of my stuff, though it's not really their cup of tea.

They're supportive and recognize me as a writer.

I don't tell others though. But then again, I don't tell people I play guitar or drums unless it somehow comes up in normal conversation.

I've noticed erotica doesn't come up too much in "normal conversation."

Unless you know the right people.

BadAssKona said...

I'm part of another writing group. We get pretty personal about stuff, so I thought I would invite them to join this blog. All of them declined. "I'm not into erotica," was the response from one of the writers who spends much time telling all of us about how many boyfriends she's had. Interesting....

Neve Black said...

Hmmm...it took me about six months' before I could break the news to my loving, but very conservative, Catholic family about my erotica writing ways.

Some of my close friends aren't into erotica, or they don't think they are, but they are there for me; offering support.

Follow your gut. If it doesn't feel right, then it probably isn't. Or hell, just jump right into the deep end and see what kind of splash you'll make. :-)

Erobintica said...

Just general comment - I guess we're the right people! ;-) It's so great to be able to talk about this.

Craig, it's funny how there are levels of friends - there are some that only peripherally know that I write at all. They are not interested and that's fine. It's a darn shame that erotica doesn't come up more often in "normal conversation" - having visions of some really different grocery aisle talks.

BAK, welcome! Oh my, I can relate. I'm part of a couple of different writing groups (they overlap - *waves in case any are reading this* haha) and I've told all the members of one - and NOBODY has said anything to me - and yeah, we get personal too. I find it curious - luckily I'm not incredibly bothered by it. This is a topic I'll be exploring more when I have the time.

Neve, I've pondered the who and when to tell thing since long before I started this - I think that's a big part of what kept me from doing anything. Now, I'm kind of in a whatever happens happens place. Follow my instinct and all that. Hmm, splash or sneak up - both could be fun. ;-)

I think that I'll tell people as it becomes necessary. One thing I know is that I'm not ashamed of what I'm doing - I used to be - that's why you haven't seen me around before. ;-) But I got over that. Thanks to people who know who they are.

Can you tell this is a subject I'll be coming back to?

Kirsten Monroe said...

Hi Robin,

I've followed Craig's "normal conversation rule" to a point. Sometimes the people who play up their naughtiness -- telling dirty jokes, going to strip clubs, etc. -- are the most weirded out.

Neve's approach works too -- it's that combination of artist and sex-positive that seems to be the most accepting, which makes sense. I'm getting to the point where I don't really care. I don't force anyone to read what I write. They can take it or leave it, just as I can choose to ignore the naysayers.

Erobintica said...

Kirsten - Sometimes the people who play up their naughtiness -- telling dirty jokes, going to strip clubs, etc. -- are the most weirded out.

Oh how true! Guess it's the all talk no action thing going on.

Ah, "normal conversation" - well, this is how it went today - as we filled each other in on our crazy, busy lives, I found myself having to edit what I was saying. Such as this is a hectic week for me because it includes hosting an erotic poetry night and taking an erotic writing class (with Rachel Kramer Bussel - be still my beating heart - somebody else used that saying recently - sorry - hahaha), and I couldn't mention those things to her without having to divulge everything - which I had decided I wasn't ready to do.

Oh, and then somebody else asked me about "guilty pleasures" and after smiling to myself, was able to truthfully give a different answer - because this is definitely NOT a guilty pleasure. A pleasure yes, but I sure don't feel at all guilty. Which is damn nice!

This looks to be an interesting trip.

Kirsten Monroe said...

"taking an erotic writing class (with Rachel Kramer Bussel - be still my beating heart"

Be still *my* beating heart! Lucky!