Tuesday, July 3, 2012

On getting a very nice review

Yesterday, thanks to Emerald, I got to read this really nice review (of Suite Encounters: Hotel Sex Stories) at Erotica Revealed. She (Em) wanted me to see this because the reviewer, Nathan Burgoine, said some especially nice words about my story, "Return to the Nonchalant Inn."

On a completely different note, “Return to the Nonchalant Inn” by Erobintica was a lovely piece with a man and a woman reminiscing on the erotic adventures of their youth – but from a vantage point of an older, wiser – and still sexually heated – perspective. I think the inclusion of this story, with a woman confident and content in her mature body, was an absolute win for the collection – and a very strong reminder that eroticism doesn’t die with the passing of years.
I've been reading that over and over again. And at times it makes me choke up. I'm 54. Not getting any younger. And as I said in my last post, I was afraid "Erobintica" was fading away. Yeah, in a way I think I've been mourning some lost youth that I never really had, because back then, I was not wiser and I sure as hell wasn't confident, or even content in my younger body. But these past few years, Erobintica has been a journey for me. And I'm learning something new about myself every day. Sometimes I like what I learn, sometimes I don't.

Or more exactly, I don't like some things about me, even though they may be crucial to who I am. Who I will be happy as. When you deny parts of yourself, you shut yourself off from being "confident and content." I've always been worried about what people (those amorphous "people") would think and worried that those who mean a lot to me wouldn't like who I am (or want to become). But that kind of worrying and thinking is so fucking self-limiting, that it was almost as if a sign from Eros, that I saw this posted on Facebook the other day. I saved it on my desktop and even printed it out so I can glance at it often:

I've always admired that in other people. Maybe it's time to try it on for myself.


Anonymous said...

Well, like I said in the review, it was a standout. I'm glad my words did justice to how happy I was to find that story in the collection.


Erobintica said...

Thanks 'Nathan!

Joan Price said...

Oooh, I want to read this story! I love your work, and this sounds like an authentic depiction of sexuality at our age.

Speaking of authenticity, I think that's what you're struggling with. You are committed to being authentic, whether that pleases others (or, sometimes, yourself) or not. It's the only battle worth fighting, in my view. Good for you writing about this and letting us weigh in.

Joan Price

Author of Naked at Our Age: Talking Out Loud about Senior Sex and Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty.

Join us -- we're talking about ageless sexuality at http://www.NakedAtOurAge.com.

Erobintica said...

Thanks, Joan! :)

And hmmm. I hadn't realized that - about authenticity - but yeah - for some reason it's very important to me - for the same reason that while I'm using the name Erobintica as a byline, I'm not hiding behind it. And yeah, I struggle with it constantly.