Tuesday, June 28, 2011

A lot to say, Part 1

It's been more than a month since I've posted anything here and I decided I better get my ass in gear and post something for June! This post will probably jump around all over the place, so fasten your seat belts!

Today I clicked on the the "yes, mobile template" button so that folks looking at my blog from a mobile device can hopefully read it easier, and so maybe more will read. Of course, I have to write something for there to be something to read, so I hope to remedy the lack of updates with various odd postings. If you are reading this on a mobile device and have read here before without the new fancy schmancy mobile template, I'd appreciate hearing if it made a difference or not.

This past Saturday (June 25), I read a few of my poems at Essensuality in NYC. Billed as "An Evening of Erotic Expression," this series run by Monica Day, is a wonderful venue for material that might not be appropriate to share at a "regular" reading venue.  I appreciate venues like this, and The Erotic Literary Salon (run by Susana Mayer, a friend of Monica's, in Philadelphia), where I've read before, because I get to read the poems that I don't do otherwise, like this one. I'll talk a bit about why in a minute.

I'd attended Essensuality once before, back in March when Jeremy Edwards was a featured performer. Then, and again this month, the evening is a smorgasbord of erotic performances, including music, dance,  poetry, fiction, memoir, skits, and more. It truly is an OPEN mike.

Which brings me back to why I don't read some of my poems for ... how should I put this? ... general audiences. I know that poems that erotically use the words cunt and cock in them would not go over with everyone (emphasis on everyone) at a plain old poetry reading. I am NOT in this for the shock value. Also, I am chicken. At venues like Essensuality and The Erotic Literary Salon, people are there expecting to hear stuff like that. *And if not, they make a quick exit. My hope is that someday, after reading enough times at venues like these, that I'll become more comfortable reading these sorts of works. Anyhow. It was a good evening. I think my friend enjoyed it. I'll be back next time (in September) when Emerald is scheduled to be a feature.


One thing I've been dealing with over the past several years (at least) is how it feels to me that society in general STILL thinks that any and all expressions of our real sexuality should be kept behind closed doors, under the covers, and in the dark. I hear it in off-hand comments from friends, relatives, and acquaintances. I hear it in commentary from various self-proclaimed pundits. I heard a lot of it with the recent twitpic media frenzy. And all that reinforces the shame that I've been fighting against for way longer. It manifests in small ways.

For the past several months I've been working to revamp my personal website, the one for the "writer" me. For a few years, there was no linkage between there and here. Then there was a covert link on a crowded page. That page is gone now (too many broken links). My new site is going to fully meld all my various and diverse writing activities. It will link to this blog, and others. It will link to any poems I can link to. It will have video of my readings, including the one at The Erotic Literary Salon. 

I've been having a hard time with this. Working very slowly. Part of the reason is that while I want to be completely open about the Erobintica side of me (as I put it), I still am a little hesitant.

Why? Well, I'd keep going, but it's evening and we're going to watch the special features disc from Pan's Labyrinth tonight and I have to be up very early tomorrow. So I'm going to post this and come back to it - hopefully tomorrow afternoon.


Emerald said...

I look forward to seeing your lovely new site.

How sweet of you to mention September's Essensuality and that you plan to be there! The event sounds so magnificent—I am really looking forward to attending!
(I am liking the idea you emailed about more and more, btw. ;))

In regard to the other things you said, have you ever read this article by Marty Klein? I was reminded of it when I read what you wrote here. Specifically, I recalled this part:

"Sexologist David Steinberg points out that most of us limit how much we fondle our partners in public, out of 'respect' for those uncomfortable with others' sexuality. But, he asks, why does society agree that we have to accommodate the least erotically comfortable people? This trivializes the discomfort of more erotically comfortable people who are forced to repress themselves in public. Instead, why not have 'fondlers' set the standards, and expect others to deal with their discomfort? Our culture assumes that repressed people's exposure to erotic activity is more painful (and therefore needs more protection) than non-repressed people's being prevented from expressing themselves erotically."

I found that idea very interesting and had to admit it had never occurred to me before.

Kam said...

My initial comment vanished (must be an artifact of mobile device format), so I hope two don't show up! What I had said was I look forward to the confluence of all your parts and types of writings, and that what makes you interesting is the contrast of your opposing parts and the inner struggle that such opposition naturally engenders. I hope to see lots more from you soon! And I am not yet sold on the mobile format (this is being typed on an iPhone), there seem to be some glitches, although the format is easier to read.

Erobintica said...

Thanks Em! I'd not read that article and I intend to. That's very interesting indeed. I tend towards the fondler end of the spectrum (and as a result make others uncomfortable!), yet I'd never thought of it in this manner. I've always enjoyed (and been somewhat envious of) "public displays of affection" - much to think about - Thanks!

Kam, sorry your comment vanished! But glad you came back to redo it. And thank you. You know all too well how I've struggled with this, and I appreciate your insight. I'll be interested to see how this all turns out too. What will I write???

Donna said...

What an inspiring post, Robin! I also look forward to your integrated site. And the article Em mentioned, wow, excellent points. A doubly good way to start my day :-).